When Your Mate Would Rather Text than Talk

DAILY CHALLENGE Martha and her boyfriend Cal have been dating for a few months, and they get along fine. They have great conversations face-to-face, but he refuses to call and talk to her on the phone or leave voice mails. Instead, Cal prefers to send her text messages and e-mails (usually very short in duration). Should Martha be concerned? If so, what can she do about it? Tags: text, text messages, texting, wireless, phone, telephone, voice mail, e-mai

DAILY FIX

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This is nothing to be too concerned about. A lot of people have issues with talking on the phone, and the problem is only going to get worse in the wireless age. It's strange for many people, especially guys, to try and communicate on the phone while not being able to see their conversation partner's face to gauge reactions.



But there is a way for Martha to slowly break Cal of his texting habit if it continues to bother her. Don't text or e-mail him. When he texts her, she should reply with a phone call. If she has something to tell him, she should do so with a call or voice mail. At no point, for a few months anyway, should Martha ever send her boyfriend a text or e-mail.



Instead, Martha should write down everything she needs to know or wants to tell Cal, and deliver the messages via a single telephone call later in the day. The first times should be short, and no call should last more than a half an hour. Otherwise, it might become an annoyance and create new problems in the relationship.



However, Martha needs to be wary about ignoring time-sensitive messages. If Cal texts her asking what time she wants to eat dinner that night, then it would be okay to go ahead and text back. After all, no one wants to be ignored, and some information is more convenient in text. When you're in a business meeting or at the gym, it's much easier to glance at a text than to answer a call for a five word conversation.



And be very wary of sexting – the practice of sending intimate photos or messages by phone. You may think they're private, but who knows who might see his screen…or who he'll share it with in the future.



With a bit of time and patience, this method should slowly ease Martha's boyfriend into the phone conversation pool and work him toward the deep end of soulful communication gradually, rather than throwing him in head first.

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Comments

Viewing 1 - 1 out of 1 Comments mariahkvesich Oct 27, 2009 09:09 PM Some people can't talk on the phone while at work, or maybe they're at a place where its loud and they can't hear a phone call. While I don't think texting should be the main form of communication, take it for what its worth. He's thinking about you and wants you to know. What's even better than phone conversation is face to face and maybe your guy wants to save his thoughts for times when you're together and there's nothing wrong with that.