Trading in Your Old Husband for Your Dream Lover

Today I was listening to a song from the 80s and started reminiscing about some guy I barely knew who the song reminded me of.  For about 2 seconds, I went down the "what if" lane, only to realize that maybe, just maybe, I had a perfectly good man at home.  Maybe having the husband of my dreams was, like having the home of my dreams, a matter of perspective.

I bring up my house because it is a good metaphor for my marriage.  We built this house in 2007 and, about 3 days after signing the contract, we wanted to change our model to a bigger, better model. We were denied the change (with a lie), and I've been bitter about it ever since. I've kicked and cussed and mentally knocked down walls and built additions - none of which are in my budget for a long time.  But now, I don't want to trade my home. I have an awesome piece of property and the best neighbors in the world in an outstanding school district.  It's just that I've been so blinded by not-so-great kitchen and my one-story family room that I couldn't see the forest for the trees. I decided to do what I should have done from the beginning: forgive the lousy salesperson, thank God that I have a home and a way to pay for it, and start listing the great stuff that's already happened since we've lived here.

That's what I'm going to do with my husband.  He has his faults, but, as Mark Darcy says to Bridget Jones in "Bridget Jones' Diary", "I like you just the way you are".  Of course, there is a scene where she lists all his bad points to his face and another scene where he finds even more things she can't stand about him in her diary, but she, too, likes him just he way he is.  I saw this movie last night and it hit home for me.

I don't need some tune from way back when to remind me of some "dream" guy I could have had.  Who knows if it would have worked out?  We wouldn’t have had our fabulous children whom I adore, that’s for sure.  I already married my dream man, and he's awesome.